How to talk to somebody about suicide
Discussing suicidal thoughts may seem like a daunting prospect. Learn to shape these discussions with clear and practical advice.Read more
Ending significant relationships is difficult. In some situations, the overwhelming nature of the situation can lead to one partner feeling hopeless and suicidal. Learn how to support an ex-partner who is distressed or suicidal.
Ending significant relationships is difficult. In these situations, there can be a great deal of emotion and uncertainty and often the decision to end the relationship is made by one of the partners despite the feelings and commitment of the other.
In some situations, the overwhelming nature of the situation can lead to one partner feeling hopeless and suicidal.
In these situations, it is more often the person who feels aggrieved or abandoned who might feel suicidal rather than the person who has chosen to end the relationship.
The person who made the decision to end the relationship has usually gone through a lengthy grieving and letting-go process, before leaving the relationship. And in most cases, they have already determined what their future will look like. They are much further along the journey of separation than the other partner.
In contrast, while the person left behind might have been aware of conflict or problems within the relationship, it often comes as a shock when their partner leaves. In some instances, the aggrieved or abandoned partner may then directly blame the other, for the suicidal feelings they are having.
Alternatively, the person who made the decision to end the relationship may in some way feel responsible or that they have done something to cause them to feel this way. It is important to understand that it is usually not their fault.
It may be helpful to remember the following if you are ever in this situation:
It is important for you to remember that your partner or spouse is responsible for their own thoughts and feelings, just as you are responsible for your own thoughts and feelings.
It can be very difficult to work out how much support you can provide your partner as they go through their personal grieving process following the end of your relationship. Even though you have made the decision to end the relationship, it can be very troubling to witness someone who you have had a relationship with experiencing such distressing emotions.
While you may want to give the other person support, it is important that they do not get the wrong message about your thoughts about possibly continuing the relationship.
There are a number of things that you can do, including:
If you are with your former partner and their life is in immediate danger, or you are concerned for their safety in any way:
If you are worried about someone, and need someone to talk to, call the Suicide Call Back Service on 1300 659 467 to speak to a counsellor.
If it is an emergency, please call 000.
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